When I was first starting to ease my way into anal play, I bought myself my first-ever butt plug. But I found out in a very uncomfortable way that the one I purchased wasn’t very beginner-friendly. 

I decided to use it for the first time with my then-partner. As we were in the heat of the moment, my partner inserted the butt plug into my behind and it immediately gave me a painful sensation. I found out later on that the one I bought was massive for someone with no prior anal training, like myself.

Even though my butt plug ordeal cannot compare to the horror stories of people needing medical interventions to remedy their failed attempts at butt plug play, I wish I did my research and read up on how to safely use them for a pain-free and pleasurable experience.

That is why I’m very glad to share with you this guide on how to choose the best beginner butt plug for you and how to use them safely during solo play or partnered sex.

What is a Butt Plug?

A butt plug or an anal plug is a sex toy inserted into the anus for sexual gratification. It can be worn during any kind of sex act to enhance pleasure. It can also be used specifically to target the P-spot (Male equivalent for the G-spot) or the prostate to induce orgasm for men. 

But because of the many nerve endings around and inside the anus, anal plug play can be pleasurable for people of all sexes, not only people with penises. According to sex therapist Dr. Donna Oriowo, only 20 percent of those nerve endings are used to keep things working in the rectum department. The remaining 80 percent is for experimentation of sensations and touch.

Playing with butt plugs is a good way to get into anal play. Sex experts suggest using it for anal training or acclimating your anus before anal sex or even using bigger penetrative toys. Anal training is especially important because the tissues and the muscles in the anus can easily tear without proper preparation.

Different Types of Butt Plugs

There are a variety of butt plugs available in the market. They come in different designs, textures and colors. Some are made to look like an egg, while some are ribbed or wavy. They also come in different sizes, tiny to massive ones. But according to writer and sex educator Liz Goldwyn, since the anus has a high concentration of nerve endings, even the tiniest of butt plugs will stimulate it. 

Moreover, butt plugs can also be made from different materials. They can be made from silicone, metal, glass and even wood. All of these variations don't even cover all the possibilities. We’ll leave the other ones for you to explore. But for now, here are the most common butt plugs for beginners.

1. Basic

This anal plug looks like a tear-drop. It has a smooth plug head with a tapered end, to make insertion easy and painless. It also has a flared base to keep the plug in place when being used. This is a no nonsense option, most suited for when you’re just starting out.

2. Ribbed

For added sensation, these plugs feature ribbed patterns to stimulate the muscles in the anus. This type gives extra stimulation when nudged inside the anal area.

3. Vibrating

With this one, you don’t only get a butt plug but also a vibrator. The buzzing feeling from a vibrating butt plug can exponentially increase stimulation in the rectal area. In addition, depending on the toy’s intensity, the stimulation can also be felt in the penis (and even the C-spot and G-spot for women-users.)

Vibrating butt plugs can also come with a remote control. Other advanced ones can even be controlled by a smartphone. This can be particularly fun to use when you want your partner to take control during play.

4 Prostate Plug

This one is designed to specifically target the prostate. It is particularly longer than the basic butt plugs. It is made to be curved and flexible for penetrating the sigmoid colon.

5. Fetish Plugs

These butt plugs can be exciting and unique. They are designed to gratify certain sexual fantasies or fetishes. One of the most common fetish butt plugs are the ones attached with tails. The synthetic fur tail is attached to the base of the plug, appearing to be hanging on the rear when the butt plug is inserted. This gives the impression of tail-wagging when being used. 

Princess butt plugs are also very popular. These are jewel butt plugs with cute and more feminine designs, usually marketed toward women.

What to Look for in a Beginner Butt Plug?

Small Size

When starting with anal play, many sex experts suggest starting with your pinky finger. From there, you can just work your way up, size-wise. The same logic has to apply with using butt plugs as a beginner. Start with the tiniest one. And then once your anus is acclimated to the situation of having a foreign object in there, gradually increase the size until you find what’s perfect for you.

Gentle Material

Silicone-made butt plugs are the go to for a gentle and smooth experience, and that is why it’s best for those who are just starting out. Other materials, such as glass-made butt plugs, are preferred by people looking for a more weighted pressure.

Whatever material you choose, make sure that it is non-porous. Porous materials are those made with rubber and elastomer. Using butt plugs made with these materials tends to hold onto bacteria from the anus even after cleaning. The build-up bacteria may cause you hygiene and health issues, which will definitely spoil your fun.

Tapered Tip and Flared Base Design

For easy insertion, you should look for a teardrop shaped butt plug. Its tapered tip will prepare the muscles and the tissues of the anus for the whole plug. To reiterate, go for the slimmer and simpler designs, this will make the experience easier and more enjoyable.

When it comes to the base of the butt plug, go with a flared one. This ensures that the butt plug will stay in place and will not risk the possibility of it being sucked up inside. Unlike the vagina where dildos and other toys are prevented by the cervix from going further, the anus doesn’t have this natural stopper. So things can easily go awry.

How to Use a Butt Plug

Now that we’ve hyped up butt plugs for you and you’re quite set on using one, I believe it’s highly important to give a detailed and straightforward guide on how to actually use it without any pain.

Step 1: Pre-stretching

Your rectum isn’t made to have things shoved in it, so it is something to train for. This being said, before putting in a sizable butt plug, use something smaller like your fingers to open it up. Also, make sure to trim your fingers beforehand to avoid any anal abrasions, which can lead to an infection. 

Step 2: Lubrication

Make sure that you use lube from the very beginning. Since the anus is not self-lubricating, putting things up in it will create friction. This can damage the anal tissues which can be very painful. 

Water-based lube is your best bet because it is mostly suitable for all kinds of butt plug material. But if you are not using a butt plug that is silicone-made, I suggest that you go for a silicone lube. It is best for anal play because it is long lasting and extra thick.

When using lube, the more generous you are, the better.

Step 3: Initial Insertion & Positioning

One very important key to anal play is relaxation. So before inserting anything up in your anus, you have to relax, breathe deeply and slowly unclench your sphincter muscle.

For the initial insertion of the butt plug, do an in and out method. You start by pushing the tip into your anus. Once the tip is in, hold it in there for a moment. After a moment, retract the butt plug and then push it back in slightly deeper. Do this as many times as you need to fully insert the rest of the butt plug, leaving the base out.

Now that the hard part’s done, it’s time to enjoy it. You can leave the butt plug in during masturbation or sex. You may also choose to thrust it in and out. Totally up to you. The most important thing to remember is that whatever you do, do it slowly and gently.

Step 4: Removal

Once you are done using the plug, get ready to remove it. Do this by grabbing the stem and pulling it out gently. Take note that the sphincter muscle may have clenched around it so do not just yank it out. If this is the case, do what you did during the insertion. Relax and breathe deeply. If this doesn’t open it up, try to release the plug like you are having a bowel movement. This will ensure a pain free and safe removal.

One thing to expect when removing the butt plug is that there can be fecal residue on the toy. That’s just the reality of it, and you just have to get over it. Also for this reason, you cannot use the butt plug in other holes without thoroughly cleaning it first.

Our Recommendations

1. Ariel Silicone Vibrating Anal Plug - Training Kit

The Arial Anal Plug is the perfect kit for beginners. The different sizes will make anal training considerably easier. One review, commended how the plugs are smooth, sturdy and easy to clean. Its matt black color and minimalist design make it look very slick. 

2. 3in1 Anal Vibrator Bullet with Vibrating Cock Ring

This one is the ultimate deal for those who enjoy sex toys for their penis and is just branching out to anal toys. It looks very simple but gives pleasure in threefold ways.

3. Idris - Anal Vibrator & Vibrating Anal Plug Set

The Idris Plug Set can be a delight for both beginners and those already with butt plug experience. All three plugs are ribbed for extra pleasure, but at the same time, the size is not too intimidating for our first timers.

4. Rainbow Gem Prism Metal Butt Plug

The gem prism at the base of the butt plug makes for a very pleasing sight. The body of the plug also has an iridescent hue to it. It’s just a very pretty plug overall. Nonetheless, it’s very safe to use and the size is just the perfect one to begin with.

5.Long Fox Tail Butt Plug - Brown Fur

This butt plug has a cute artificial fur tail attached to the aluminum alloy butt plug. The actual material to be inserted inside the anus is very body safe and beginner friendly. Having the tail part hanging and wagging while you are in motion just adds fun to the play. 

6. Habiki - Hollowed Anal Vibrator & Prostate Massager

This may look intimidating at first, but it’s made with ultra-soft and flexible materials to make it easier for beginners. It has 9 vibrating patterns to choose from, it’s remote-controlled and it has this hollowed design that makes it perfect for massaging the prostate.

Butt Plug Safety and Aftercare

Usage Hazards

  • Butt plug may get stuck 

- objects inserted into the anus can potentially get lost up in there and even travel up into the bowel. Unlike the vagina being closed off by the cervix, the rectum leads directly to the sigmoid colon. If this happens, medical intervention is necessary. That is why it’s very important to get a butt plug with a flared end to prevent this.

  • Anus is easily perforated 

- bigger butt plugs, especially when inserted forcefully or abruptly, can lead to sphincter tear or anal fissure, detachment and even rectal failure. This is why you should insert a butt plug only when you are relaxed and stop immediately when it is painful. It is also not recommended to leave a butt plug for more than two hours.

  • Risk of STI 

- butt plugs, when used during partnered sex, should never be shared to avoid the risk of sexually transmitted infections. For further safety, it is recommended to cover butt plugs with condoms for hygiene.

Safe and Proper Use

  • Be generous with lube 

- the anus is not self-lubricating, unlike the vagina, so the use of lube is very crucial with any anal play, just like with using a butt plug. Use plenty of lubricant to avoid any tearing up in there.

The type of lube that you use also matters. For good measure, use water-based lubricant. Silicone-based lubricants will mess up butt plugs that are made from silicone. If possible, use lube that is specifically formulated for anal play, since regular lube tends to dry up faster. Using lube will not only make the experience safe but also pleasurable. 

  • Go slow and easy 

- I cannot reiterate this enough, the tissues up in your anus are very delicate and prone to damage, so you must take extra care when inserting a foreign object back there. You’d want to go slowly to give room for the muscles to adjust. Always start small with the penetration.

  • Clean thoroughly after use 

- You should wash your butt plug immediately after use with soap and hot water. If your plug is made out of glass, silicone or stainless steel, you can boil them to disinfect.(Be careful about the boiling, not all of the products can be boiled) This will prevent any fecal residue or other harmful bacteria from hanging on to your toy and put you at risk of infection. 


Which butt plug is best for beginners?

The best butt plug for beginners are the ones with a tapered tip and flared base design. These two features will ensure a beginner-friendly approach to anal training. The tapered tip will make insertion easier and painless while the flared base will help you make sure that the butt plug stays in place when in use, and prevent it from getting lost and stuck up there.

What is the best butt plug size for me?

The best butt plug size for you will depend on several factors, including your experience and preference. For the beginners, always start small and then work your way up from there. You’ll have to feel it out and figure out what feels good for you.

Once you already have the experience, upgrade to the next size. But always make sure you approach this gently and with lots of lube. Apart from the size, you can at this stage explore the different textures and designs to elevate your anal plug play.

Are butt plugs painful and uncomfortable?

Using butt plugs should not be painful and uncomfortable. Its use is supposed to elevate your sexual experience by stimulating your anus, which you should find arousing. However, it may be the case that some people are more sensitive in the anal area, so extra precaution should be taken to not feel any discomfort, especially if it’s your first time using it.


You should applaud yourself for reading this guide and educating yourself about exploring your sexual interests. This should kick start you on your budding journey with butt plugs. 

Bear in mind that accounts of unsafe butt plug use stems from the shame that surrounds it. Just like with the use of other sex toys, proper research is essential for a safe and pleasant experience. So leave behind all biases and hesitations about butt plugs and enjoy a pleasure-filled affair.

With all of that said, the one most important takeaway that I want you to get from this guide is this: BUTT PLUG PLAY SHOULD NEVER BE PAINFUL.